See previous posts for earlier Zodiac signs.

SIGN:  SAGITTARIUS.

Sagittarius is the theatrical sign of “THE ARCHER”. Those born between November 22nd and December 21st usually view life through a philosophical eye, looking forward eagerly and obviously  to changes is the status quo. As Sagittarians, many spend inordinate amounts of time during their younger years sitting around, thinking about the deep and true meanings of things. Eventually they are awarded advanced degrees in philosophy, rendering them useless and unemployable. They relish changing their pursuits to fit their extroverted natures. Some may be found haunting karaoke bars and other raucous musical venues where they love to display their talents, of which they have few. It is a wonder there is no named charity specifically designed to help them survive….so they become actors and/or musical performers or they employ actors and/or musical performers. Miley Cyrus was born on November 23rd. Britney Spears was born on December 2nd. Christina Aguilera was born on December 18th. Walt Disney was born on December 2nd.

SUB-SIGN:  THE MOON

The Moon is the ironic sign of “THE ARCHING TWERKER”. While 50% of the moon is its far side, and remains hidden to those on earth, those born on November 23rd are un-proportionately more likely to expose their backsides.

If Sarah Palin was the centerfold, I’d subscribe to “Field and Stream”.

It’s a shame his name wasn’t Alexander Graham Fart. Ring tones would be much more entertaining..

If we were politically correct, there’d be more stuttering auctioneers.

The first time I went “fly” fishing, I hooked my boxer shorts.

My flight instructor said I have a bad altitude.

My beef liver ice cream float tastes a little “off”. Continue reading LOOK WHAT I STEPPED IN. →

People don’t like to be stereotyped. They don’t want to be lumped in with the few of their demographic who behave poorly.

But all cops are alike. Right?

When Freddie Gray died while being transported in police custody, the Baltimore police force was told to “stand down” as riots erupted. I didn’t work to quell the rioting, but it did keep police from having to be confrontational with citizens and possibly shoot someone.

After the black men who were shot by police in Louisiana and Minnesota and prior to any official investigatory findings, protests broke out. Twelve cops were shot by a black man who said he wanted to kill white police in Dallas. Five died. There were public celebrations regarding these innocent officers’ deaths and more protests nationwide. Today, the Dallas police headquarters went into lockdown after an anonymous threat.

Some people are really angry with cops (particularly white cops). Who can forget the “Black Lives Matter” chant? “Pigs in a blanket. Fry ’em like bacon…”.

I suggest cops “stand down” rather than responding to calls in anti-cop neighborhoods. People have a right to protect their own hometowns and usually employ police to do it. So, in lieu of using cops, let  those residents patrol their own neighborhoods as an armed version of the Guardian Angels. Surely they can protect their neighbors and themselves without being forced to shoot.  Problem solved?

One other thought: Each and every person who celebrated the deaths of those five innocent Dallas police officers were protesting against Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s  beliefs, at the same time. Will we see protests against them?

Mr. Trump is running for the Presidency as a Republican.

Republicans tend to favor the 2nd Amendment and agree with the NRA on most issues.

The NRA is against irresponsible people acquiring guns.

I don’t think Donald Trump should own any firearms. But if he does, I must assume he has a good stock of fashionable Kevlar underpants because he doesn’t appear to limp…yet.

PROBLEM: Vermont has the least restrictive gun laws of any state. If a resident  wants to carry a concealed handgun in Vermont, he/she CANNOT get a permit to do so. You don’t need one. Buy your gun, pop it in your pocket and you are good to go.

RESULT: Vermont has the lowest gun murder rate, per capita,  of any state. Averaging more than zero, but less than one per 100,000 residents per year.

OFFICER INVOLVED SHOOTINGS: Average, Zero. Continue reading THE RESULTS OF FREEDOM IN VERMONT. →

Here we go again.

In the past couple of days two black men were killed in officer involved shootings. As always, there’s been a rush to judgment, this time spurring a protest in downtown Dallas. The media is broadcasting a new tragedy this evening. Ten police officers have been shot. Three are dead, three are in critical condition and of this hour, three are reportedly in surgery. This, according to the media. Continue reading RUSH TO JUDGEMENT. →

What would you do if, in order to mail a letter via the United States Post Office, you knew part of the postage would be used to promote  the campaign of a candidate you did not favor? Aside from being bizarre, that would clearly be wrong. Of course, you could choose to have your mail delivered by another carrier, but how realistic is that? Continue reading CAMPAIGN FINANCE AND UNIONS →

Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. That is a fact.

Truth depends upon perception and belief. Fact does not.

You need to look both ways when crossing your eyes.

You are what you eat. Your Trout Almondine ate worms.

I was a butterfly wrestler until I lost a couple of fingers.

Betty Rubble was much hotter than Wilma. (Except in the movie).

I can’t see why vitamin A is so beneficial.

Aesop was fact-deficient.

Echo was the great love of Narcissus. I said, Echo was the great love of Narcissus.

“…and this little piggy went wee, wee, wee…anyone got a mop?”

Jack Sprat and was forced to clean it up.

Want to teach someone a lesson? Forget the duck, put an ostrich in their car.

“Is that a gun in your pocket? Because your toe is over there.”

The number of times your buttered bread will fall face down depends upon the price of your carpet.

Adding kosher pickle spice to bread batter is backwards because it makes the dough dill.

Japanese men vote when they have an erection.

My uncle was circumcised twice. Now he’s my  aunt.

I bred my Pit Bull with my Toy Poodle and didn’t get a dangerous puppy, just a terrible gossip.

Those who don’t know cabbage are doomed to repeat it.

Narcoleptic hang-gliding is fun to watch (in a sad sort of way).

Politicians are like matches. They belong somewhere safe but are usually found in someone’s pocket.

Consciousness is just a state of mind…And highly overrated.